Understanding irrational behavior in people can be tricky, especially when dealing with someone who does something that seems completely crazy or illogical. For example, have you ever been in a situation where you've been talking to someone, and they said or did something that left you scratching your head and wondering, "what the heck are you thinking?"
This blog post will discuss how to get to the root of this behavior and understand why someone might say or do something irrational. This is based on the research and insights of Walter Peters, who has been studying and researching human beings, communication, and behavior for the better part of 40 years and helps his clients develop power and freedom no matter their circumstances.
To begin with, the number one motive of every human being is safety. Everything we do is in some way connected to being safe, whether it's avoiding a consequence, protecting ourselves from a future event, or reinforcing our current circumstances. So there is always an internal conversation about what is and isn't safe, and we're always going to choose what we think is the safest path.
Secondly, whether you believe it or not, whether you like it or not, everybody is always doing the absolute best that they can do right now, given who they are, what they know, their training, their background, and their education. In every given moment, they're making the best choice they know how to make. Nobody ever approaches a situation and thinks, "let's see how I can screw this up." Everyone is always looking for the best possible outcome, the best possible result.
So, when you are faced with someone who says or does something irrational, you need to put yourself in their shoes. Consider for a moment that you just did or said what they just did or said, and then ask yourself, "why would I do that?" As human beings, we are more alike than we are different. Our similarities are vastly more than our differences. We all have the same desires, motives, concerns, fears, hopes, dreams, and wishes. We all want safety, love, health, food, and shelter. This works because if you put yourself in the position of that person and then ask yourself, "why would I have done that?" you will immediately have an insight as to what's driving their behavior, and you'll be right.
This approach works fabulously, giving you more insight into what's motivating them to do what they're doing. At this point, you can either choose to get more engaged with them because you may need their cooperation, and now you understand their motive, purpose, and intention. As a result, you can align with them better and bring them closer to what you're committed to and want. Or, you can realize that this person's behavior is too irrational, and you just need to give them space and let them do what they're doing and not get more engaged because there's no cheese down that tube.
In conclusion, understanding irrational behavior in people can be tricky, but it is possible. By putting yourself in their shoes and asking yourself, "why would I have done that?" you can gain insight into their motives and intentions. With this information, you can decide whether to engage with them further or give them space. Remember, everyone is always doing their best with the information they have, and everyone's top concern is safety. By keeping this in mind, you can better understand why people behave the way they do and make more informed decisions about how to interact with them.
Want to get help communicating with someone in your life? Book a 15-minute strategy call with me, and I will give you a few tips on how to get started.